The sooner you realize this sad but true fact, the sooner you can get on with finding Mr. Close-Enough-To-Perfect. Prince Charming, riding on a white stallion, lost his way or found Princess Charming and got married on his way to your castle. Get over it and get on with it. You ARE going to have to actively seek the man of your dreams and you won’t find him hiding under your bed. You already know that he isn’t among the men that you are acquainted with so, now what? Online dating is “what”.

It’s true that online dating, while in its infancy, was only made up of perverts, sexual predators, nerds and weirdoes but that is no longer true. It has become the main tool of the single person in every developed country in the world. Forty million people can’t all be wrong. Ask your girl friends if they have ever used online dating or are using it now. If they are honest with you, most of them have or are now members of at least one online dating site and maybe more than one. It really is the way to go to meet eligible men who want to meet you. It doesn’t matter what any of your numbers are…like age, height, weight or income either. Somewhere out there in the big wide world there is a man who will like you…..then love you….and think that you are beautiful and desirable. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” is true. What is considered beautiful in one part of the world is completely different from what is considered beautiful in another part of the world. It’s even different from one part of this country to another.

Find an online dating site that fits your needs. Write a great profile and post a flattering picture. Start contacting eligible men on the site. Mr. Close-enough-to-perfect could be a few mouse clicks away.

With the explosion of online dating sites has come a virtual smorgasbord of choices. There are free sites… I don’t recommend those but if money is a real concern, they are better than nothing. There are the large paid sites with many and varied features like chat, IM and even matching using profiles. There are the less expensive paid sites with few features. There are special interest sites for almost any thing you can think of…outdoor enthusiasts, couch potatoes, religious, non-religious, gays, lesbians…like I said…almost anything you can think of. So what’s a girl to do? A girl should choose the site or sites that best fit her needs.

Here are some things to consider:

(1) Cost. How much do you want or how much can you spend each month for your membership (s)?

(2) Features. Which features are the most important to you?

(A)    Profile matching systems. Is this a feature you really want or would you rather decide who is right for you all by yourself?

(B)     Chat and IM’s? There are websites who offer chat rooms and IM’s on their sites. Does that matter or would you be happy just sticking to private email.

(C)     Outside Events…such as speed dating? Are you interested in that?

(D)    Privacy. Some websites allow you to limit who can view your picture or your profile. Does this matter to you or do you want as wide exposure as you can have?

(E)Safety. There are websites who do background checks of all subscribers and certify their age, marital status and background. Would you feel safer using this feature?

These are a few things but not all things you should consider when choosing an online dating service or services. Do your homework and choose wisely for the best results for you.

Your friend has decided that you need help with your social life so she sets you up with a blind date….a friend of a friend of a friend.  You, foolishly, accept.  Now there you are. It’s less than one hour since you were introduced.  You are sitting in a Thai restaurant and you hate Thai food.  The entrée has not yet been served.  His idea of enlightened conversation is who will be in the final four…you aren’t into sports. He knows the weekly TV schedule verbatim….you haven’t sat through a movie in months because you run marathons and volunteer at the local food bank. He says, “Volunteering is a waste of time because you can’t help ‘those people’ anyway.” You look at your watch; see that it’s only been 10 minutes since you last looked at it the last time and wonder how long it is before you can gracefully remove yourself from the situation.  Been there?

Now imagine a date with someone you met through internet dating and have been chatting online with and exchanging emails with for quite some time. First, you don’t need to be introduced.  You already know this man.  You are sitting in an Italian restaurant enjoying a delightful meal because you both know that the other’s favorite is Italian. The conversation flows easily as you discuss common interests.  He runs marathons and loves history just like you do. You happily discuss the volunteer work that each of you is involved in. You look at your watch and discover that it is late…very late…where Has the time gone.

There is a big difference between a well-intentioned friend “setting you up” and choosing a man for yourself who shares your interests and tastes, isn’t there?  Now which one would you rather have?

OK … the time has come. He has joined an online dating service or two. Now you must write that the most important … a profile that will attract attention and reel in the man of your dreams … but where to start? Perhaps the writing is something that not even think to do all that well. Even so, you can.
The first thing is to be completely honest with himself. Looking for the man, perhaps one day love … … … YOU. REAL YOU! Examine past relationships and a list of things she likes and the things he did not like. If you smoke at home and hated it, not like it better next time. If you love cats and always wants to own one or more, say you are a lover of animals and domestic pets want. Someone who hates cats or is allergic to them is not the man for you.
Accent the things that make you unique. If you play the piano well, you really want Mr. Right to appreciate it. If you run in marathons, a couch potato is not a good game. If you like art, you really do not want a man who thinks Picasso is an ice cream flavor.
Describe things that are of vital importance in your life. If volunteering is something that makes you feel useful and valuable, you want someone to at least support, if not to join their volunteer projects. To reach beyond the superficial things that attract men who share their values.
Invest in your online profile by hiring a professional photographer for the first line of image. This is so important. The image is the first thing people see. The second thing is to read what they wrote about you. Some online dating sites even provide a list of photographers in your area that specialize in online dating site photos.

There are some things that women should never do in pursuit of an online relationship with a man. Here are some things to put a quick end and any further communication with him.

While chatting online or by email do not write your life story. His eyes glaze over and fall off the chair. Keep it short and sweet until you are asked for details … then I slowly and only answer the questions he asks. For example: If I asked how many siblings have not calling the details of your interaction with them. He really wants to know how many you have. Which has 2 (or whatever is true) and then ask how many you have. For each question that asks you, you should ask one of him. Nothing turns off a man as a long-winded woman who just does not know when or how to shut up to listen.

Never, never, never lie. I really think it is catch up sooner or later. Many women (and men) lie about their age, marital status, employment, height, weight and a host of other things in their online profiles. That is a big mistake. If you find a man you are really interested in knowing that he lied and is any possibility that the relationship progresses. Therefore, be honest. There is someone out there that like you … until you love … exactly the person you are.

Do not be too impatient. It makes you really desperate to see and makes a free man. They are firstly, the conquerors and if getting the person of their desires to them as it is also very easy, they will lose interest quickly. I do not want to play “hard to get.” I mean, do not push for a face to face. No email or instant message too often. Play it safe and play it cool.